Living with a non-vegan boyfriend

Originally, I wanted to share the second part of my vegan Christmas meal ideas, in which I would have shared what vegan food I made for my non-vegan boyfriend when we celebrated Christmas, but then to be honest the meal was nothing special so I thought I should write about living with a non-vegan instead.

So, let’s get right into it!

My boyfriend and I have been together for more than 6 years now (I know, that’s a lot). I went vegan 9 months ago. That time it was only a health choice without any ethical reasons. But as I read more and more books and watched documentaries I started to understand the ethical side as well, so it became so much more than a diet. At the beginning despite I didn’t eat meat, I occasionally made non-vegan food for him, and it was okay for me. But as I started to understand the ethical side I found it harder to buy and make foods with meat because I could only see the flash of a dead animal, so I quit making non-vegan foods.

He understood my reasons and he never tried to convince me to eat meat or any animal products and I really appreciate his support. And vica versa, I never tried to convince him to be vegan.

Is it hard to be in a relationship with a non-vegan? No, not at all. Maybe this is because we do not try to convince each other, to be vegan or to eat meat, we just let the other part be. To be honest we are really different people, but there has always been some important question that we agreed, obviously eating meat is not one of them, but we still agree on these things. And I fell in love with him because of these. If your boyfriend is not vegan, the worst thing that you can do is to try to force him to live in a certain way, that he doesn’t want to. It is even worse if you are doing it aggressively. It is the same thing as if he would try to force you to eat meat. You wouldn’t be happy, right? If veganism comes up, I try to gently (not always so gently, but I’m trying..) explain him or anyone else my reasons, and it works.

How does it work in the everyday life? I usually cook for myself, and he can try it if he wants (usually he doesn’t) and he cooks for himself… or buy a frozen pizza. I’ve recently started to make vegan meals which are really similar to non-vegan foods, and he likes them! This was a huge surprise for me too! I mean foods like bolognese, red lentil balls and things with soy which are the vegan versions of non-vegan foods. For Christmas, I made vegan lasagne which I know not too Christmassy but it worked! I think it is super important for a non-vegan, to see the vegan versions of non-vegan meals, and to see that these foods can be just as good or even better. As regard of the restaurant situation we don’t eat in restaurants too often, but when we do, we make sure we go to a place where we both can eat, and you can buy a salad and french fries everywhere, right? So, it’s easy to solve these situations.

That’s where we are right now, we occasionally share some vegan foods. Do I want him to be vegan? Of course, it would be so great if he would be vegan someday, but you can’t force anyone, to be a different person that he is. And if you expect others to accept your beliefs you have to accept others too.


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